Monday, September 12, 2011
First, there are no guarantees. Life is funny that way.
Second, I don't think you should be stressed out about keeping your husband out of sin. On the other hand, you would be his helpmeet to help him walk with God and not be a hindrance. This does not mean checking on him all the time, it means making his home a place where he wants to go and be.
Third, this can only come about by your walking with God. It is not burdensome (1 Jn. 5:3), it is a joy to be who God made you to be. Your being a lovely woman of God will help your husband to also walk with God. When you read 1 Peter 3 and see what a women is supposed to do with a husband who is not walking with God, the word is essentially, “stop trying to change him and just walk with God.”
Fourth, your husband's sin is his sin. It is not related to you in the sense that if you are pregnant and not as endearing as that twenty-year-old at the market, it is not because of your appearance that he strays, it is because of his mind and heart. If a man sins in a lustful way, it is not because his wife is ugly; it is because he is not satisfied with what God has given him. It is his sin, not her "shortcomings."
Fifth, just because a man enjoys looking at a beautiful woman does not mean that he is lusting after her. He may simply be enjoying God's creation. This does happen. There is much more going on than simply lust, want of ownership and desire to have sex. Sometimes, a guy can enjoy a beautiful woman in the same way he enjoys a beautiful sunset. God made them both and they are beautiful.
Finally, you may need to face the fact that you may not always be a physically beautiful woman. You may, I'm not saying that you won't. It’s just that the way the world works is that things, over time, sag. When a woman has children, their bodies do change. Sometimes they can't get that girlish figure back no matter what they do. The solution is to read your Bible and realize that physical beauty is not all that there is to real beauty. As the saying goes, beauty is only skin deep. But godliness is real beauty and is what you should be striving after. It is that kind of beauty that will be most attractive in the long term, especially to a godly man.
In making your home a joy for your husband to come home to, you should be concerned with the fruit of the Spirit, not the upholstery and the hangings. These things matter, but I would much rather come home to a cluttered home that is full of warmth and hugs than a home that is spic and span clean, but has no joy (those are not the only options). It is the same with you. It is good that you are beautiful, don't stop working on that, but if that isn't accompanied by a deep abiding godliness, things will fall all apart when you begin to show your age.